Three idiots go cycling

Decent breakfast menu with more than the usual full Scottish. Merv went for the full Scottish. If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. Steve kippers, Pete omelette, Andrew smoked salmon and eggs.  Hillyish morning with lots of small but annoying ups and downs. Before we departed we’d planned to​forage for lunch in Selkirk. It was too early to eat so the plan was to grab a picnic and eat 15 miles later. Pete went to one place and set off. Steve went to another. Merv to a third. Steve and Merv gave up waiting for Andrew and set off in hot pursuit of Pete (well - lukewarm anyway as it doesn’t take much effort to catch Pete). However it seems Andrew didn’t get the brief. The place he went to offered him free soup. Seems the owner was especially pleased with today’s soup and reckoned Andrew needed feeding up. So the rest abandoned him to his fate. We later found out he’d wobbled down the road with a mug of hot soup in his hand and a bagel stuffed down his shirt. Realising this was only going t...

Breakfast was a buffet which meant unlimited haggis for me, and very good it was too. Andrew arrived half an hour before the rest of us trenchermen but due to his slow eating disorder was still the last to leave. Left the grand but fading hotel at 9:30, out the door, turn left and straight onto 1.4 miles of rough, hilly gravel track through the woods. We weren’t expecting that!! The next 5 miles weren’t much better thanks to a 17mph headwind. But handily we then turned north east and had the wind, as Andrew says, ‘up our a**es all the way’ to Lockerbie. None of the expected showers either. The border countryside around Dumfries is lovely and we had all the help we needed to appreciate it. Unfortunately for Andrew, some of that help came from a wasp that encouragingly flew into his shirt and made its way er…South…where it then stung him. Some minutes later Pete, at the back as usual, came round a corner to find Andrew with his hands down his shorts fiddling! Being a gentleman, Pete turn...

Late breakfast served by the nice squiffy barman from the night before. Think he’d started early as he got tea and coffee mixed up on the order. Andrew aka Ernie, for anyone who had read about last summers trip, likes to carry a pint or two of milk strapped to his bag. There being no convenient shop on our route he decided to steal the jug of milk intended for breakfast cereal and fill his bottle. I’m not sure that’s how a milk round is supposed to work? Departed around 10am. Quite a hilly day today to Hawick. We left Galloway and entered The Borders. The scenery was grand; big rolling hills, woodland and valleys, rivers, pretty good roads and some nice climbs and descents. Lunch was at a cafe in Langholm. At least that’s what Steve and Andrew called it. Pete did have a scone, Merv ruminated breakfast again. Then we were immediately into 1200 feet of climbing over the next 4 miles followed by what Steve described as an 11 out of 10 descent into  Newcastleton. One of those long, not...

​Even though this is day 5 of our holiday, it’s day 1 of the actual Kirkpatrick Trail. We’ll be following it for 4 days. So that means 4 days of not being able to whine at our route planners about unnecessary extra hills. This is now the fault of the bods at Cycling UK or Sustrans or whoever put this route on the map. Mindful of a rather nasty weather front heading in from the west, we had an early and massive breakfast and set out just after 8:30. Don’t laugh - that’s early for retired people! Wind behind was a real bonus and we covered the first 34 miles before the rain at a good pace. Remember Gerald? Andrews mate from breakfast the other day? Well we passed him and his roadside mowing machine at Luce Bay. We shouted hello and he replied with something we didn’t understand (or ‘dinna ken’ as I think they say hereabouts).  Stopped for a photo at Wigtown to send to Phil who should have been with us. Next time Phil. Light rain into Newton Stewart. Andrew and Pete hit Aldi, Steve we...

​Andrew got down to breakfast before the others and, in true Andrew style, immediately starts a conversation with the only other person in the room. The rest arrive and are immersed in the sort of conversation Clarkson has with Gerald. We couldn’t understand a single word the chap was saying. Andrew later explained that 4 summers working in a Scottish bar had taught him the language.  Leisurely departure as we only had to cover 31 miles to Stranraer. Having craved an easy day on Lejog but not planned one, this was a welcome strategy. We arrived in Stranraer after fighting 16mph headwinds for four hours, including a very pleasant coffee stop in New Luce. Bit of rain but acceptable (tomorrow will be different but not in a good way). Merv, Andrew and Pete explored the castle while Steve explored the town. Think the castle was probably the more interesting option. Snacked on deep fried haggis on the way back too. History and culture all in one afternoon! It’s just like the Grand Tour e...

​Best breakfast so far in our bnb in Annan. While eating it, our host mentioned that Andrew who had booked separately to the rest had been charged £110 by the reputable booking site as their algorithm had worked out he had booked the last room. The rest had paid just £55 each. Andrew was happy to pay, and the rest were quite amazed that they had such a good deal for what was a very nice place.  Route today was through Dumfries, castle Douglas, Kirkudbright, Gatehouse of Fleet and on to Newton Stewart, mainly into the wind. Lovely countryside, a few hills and off and on showers. Steve was mortified that his companions stopped off at Castle Douglas Aldi to grab lunch so he wandered off into town to find nice pies and cakes. Andrew and Pete are fans of the quick triangle sandwich so they left him to it. Merv is like a lion; eats well but infrequently, so he didn’t eat and didn’t care! We all met up the other side of town and continued on our way. Garmin said 9 climbs for today. We cou...